I just deleted a load of Facebook friends. I felt bad while doing it. I really need to sort my shit out. Old boyfriends, people I barely ever spoke to, someone I shared my lunch with when I was 9.
So often I find myself having imaginary conversations with people from my past. I keep saying, ‘I don’t care what you think.’ It has to stop.
I was having dreams about people I haven’t seen in years. Why are you in my head? Why are you trying to drown me in this dream while I’m surrounded by Alphabetti Spaghetti and time travelling cats? Why? Facebook. I see your faces on Facebook. I see pictures of you camping, eating a steak, burping your baby, telling me you bought a £400 handbag. I see your self-congratulatory bullshit, I see your hackneyed sayings and inspirational quotes, I see the parts of your life you want me to see and I close my eyes.
Next step is to shut Facebook down. Problem is I want to see pictures of my friends with their babies, or in San Francisco eating bagels, or videos of their cats being weird. I like seeing what they want me to see. I like tracking events in my life. Maybe it’s all about reduction. I wonder what will be left.